I like the possibility that there are little fairies going around jumping on us and inspiring us. Like Puck, they cast their spells on us by sending ideas, sparks of desires, and impulses to burst into song.
I swear, a million must pass by and poke me every day.
If you are constantly being pursued by creativity, are you swatting at those fairies, or are you saying hello?
And do you have any idea why you are doing what you are doing?
Even before March 2020, I wondered how I fit into the world of opera and singing and creative work in general. I thought, "I've been here so long; no one is interested in me anymore. I've been the ingenue, and I'm not really that anymore. But I still love singing and expressing myself...at least at times. What do I want to sing even if I am not getting paid to sing it? Who the hell am I?"
I started on a creativity discovery path. I took acting classes, improv classes, and voiceover classes. I took courses on voice pedagogy and contemporary commercial music vocal teaching. I learned how to run a better voice business. I got busy y'all.
Then Covid came, and we found ourselves all in the same place. Now all of my colleagues were suddenly thrust into my already shifting sands place of "what next?' "How?" "WHY?" It was an extraordinary time. You may remember it. ;)
I built a massive garden. I threw myself into creativity in another way. I planted seed after seed after seed. I harvested. I created arrangements. I gave away beauty and bartered for things I wanted or needed. I learned. It was a great way to fill the gap. The flowers became center stage.
And now here we are. What is it, 30 or so months later?
While we no longer hover in the unknown, we have changed and adapted to new ways of being. We've started creating in new ways. We want different things. We desire new outcomes. We may yearn for the past, but we recognize there is
so much ahead that is new, fresh, and good.
But are we clear about why we want those new fresh things? Or are we just being poked by the constant nudge of the fairy? This one day, something else the next?
Do we have clarity, or are we taking any and everything to survive? Are we just mired in those old habits stemming from a place of lack?
Do we need to do that anymore, or can we trust ourselves to get clear on what it is that we want and create it?
I've been asking some deep questions lately in my creative life, both as a singer and teacher.
What are the intentions behind everything that I am doi
ng? Why am I doing this, and what do I want my legacy to be?
Ok. I know. These are some big questions. But we have gone through a significant shift, and it's time. We must remind ourselves of what is meaningful. Remember what got us here in the first place, keep what's important, and leave some other stuff behind.
For me, it's leaning into more truth and love of everything I do.
I want to stop doing things just because I feel like I'm supposed to. You know, like practicing and singing music that doesn't inspire me. Or teaching singers who don't align with my strengths as a teacher. Or even trying to beat the door down o
n a shifting industry when the tools for supplying the world with what I want to create are literally right under my fingertips at this very moment.
I want to be the teacher I always needed when I was stepping out into the professional world.
I'm doing it in several ways:
1. Helping students own, love, and cherish their process by working through mindset values and awareness of their bodies in their lessons.
2. Offering flexible ways of working with me based on the need of the student. Subscriptions to the studio give the most flexibility and variety, while packages of lessons help establish a routine for reaching your goals.
3. Building a community of Atlanta-based singers who come together to support one another in group performer practice and classes with industry specialists.
4. Maintaining the online portion of my studio to serve a broader number of singers and help local artists struggling with Atlanta traffic.
5. And finally, I'll start offering online videos of exercises and warm-ups to use when they're not in the studio to help aid their practice.
I'm still growing flowers and singing songs. But I'm also knee-deep into establishing clarity for the actions and the outcomes. And some days, I react simply because I felt the fairy spark nudge and was moved to create; that's all good too.